Alien Movie Universe

Let's Roast Alien

Alien-Covenant.com/forum/
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6707 Views17 Replies

ninXeno426

MemberPraetorianJan-19-2021 8:00 PM

In a possibly vain effort to liven things up a tad around here, I suggest we roast the Alien franchise. All 4 main movies are a go because it's a lot gunner to roast the ones we agree on. Though if you want to roast the prequels go for, be less fun in my opinion lol. AVP Requiem roast is highly recommended, show no mercy to that dumpster fire lmao. Let's try and have some fun guys

Nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for 

17 Replies

dk

MemberTrilobiteJan-21-2021 11:01 PM

Been a while since we had some levity. Thank you Bruthah.

Roasting a hallowed franchise.....Well, may as well give it a go. Ahem....

No one mentioned the obvious when coming out of cryo sleep: Damn, you got some serious stank yet don't appear to have ever made any poops or pees. 

The bar has been set low, so let the roast begin!

 

I.Raptus

ModeratorPraetorianJan-23-2021 1:08 AM
  • Andrews - "Let me see if I have this correct, Lieutenant; it's an 8-foot creature of some kind with acid for blood, and it arrived on your spaceship. It kills on sight, and is generally unpleasant. And of course, you expect me accept all this on your word."
  • Ripley - "No. I don't expect anything."
  • Andrews - "Quite a story, Mr Aaron."
  • Aaron - "Right sir, it's a beauty. Never heard anything quite like it, sir."

hox

MemberFacehuggerJan-23-2021 3:18 AM

Ripley in Aliens: “57 years in hypersleep. And I still can’t give up smoking.”

ninXeno426

MemberPraetorianJan-23-2021 4:00 AM

 Ripley on trial for blowing up a very expensive ship with story about alien killing the whole crew. Only gets a slap on the wrist with a suspension.

Nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for 

ninXeno426

MemberPraetorianJan-23-2021 4:01 AM

Thanks on joining in guys, I had almost given up on this topic lol.

Nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for 

I.Raptus

ModeratorPraetorianJan-23-2021 11:11 PM

Lets acknowledge the elephant in the room. 

Parker So, um, we think we should discuss the bonus situation...

Parker has been waiting 57 years to discuss the bonus situation. Ripley owes some serious back pay  

ninXeno426

MemberPraetorianJan-24-2021 1:36 AM

I think this was either in the script or extended Edition. Alien Resurrection...Weyland Yutani is bought out...by Walmart.

Nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for 

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:05 PM

alien plot:

Group of people gets hunted by big boi with giant sausage for a head.

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:08 PM

aliens plot:

Group of soldiers get hunted by big bois with giant sausages for heads including their mama which has bigger sausage for head and tail btw epic robot fight at end

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:08 PM

alien 3 plot:

Group of people get hunted by fast small boi with smaller sausage for head btw main character dies lololololol.

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:09 PM

alien resurrection plot:

Comedy

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:09 PM

k im not doing covenant and prometheus

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-16-2021 12:13 PM

lesson from alien:

Don't trust eggs

ninXeno426

MemberPraetorianMar-16-2021 6:41 PM

Doing prequels is encouraged lol. I'm a fan of them, but fun should be had with them.

Nothing the God of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for 

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-17-2021 12:42 AM

k im doing prequels

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-17-2021 12:43 AM

prometheus plot:

Group of people discover tall bald boi which beats them up btw tall bald boi gets attacked by squiddy god

Kamoebas V.6

MemberFacehuggerMar-17-2021 12:44 AM

alien covenant plot:

Group of people get attacked by medium boy with strange sausage for head and big organic boi with big organic sausage btw bad ending

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