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Thy Shall Not Mention AVPR Forevermore: Silliness VI

Thy Shall Not Mention AVPR Forevermore: Silliness VI

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dk

Sep-11-2019 3:02 PM

The cringe worthy train wreck that was AVPR is pretty much something that unites forum members. Let us hate on it! If you actually like AVPR, by all means, chime in- I would like to hear why you like it on its own merits alone. 

We have done this before (5 other times XD)- it is kind of free form so I will start with an obvious dud:

Note that the OT picture is a screen shot of just about any part of the movie :D

AVPR was so bad that my DVD player kept ejecting it.

23 Responses to Thy Shall Not Mention AVPR Forevermore: Silliness VI

Dark Nebula

Sep-11-2019 4:06 PM

AVPR was so dark and poorly lit, that I had to wear this thing just so I could see what was happening.

And even that didn't really help, movie itself was [email protected]

BigDave

Sep-11-2019 4:06 PM

I think we REALLY need to look at the SET-UP, and remember that the Movie AVPR is a Sequel.

And so its a case of WHERE do they go NEXT?

So with the ENDING that was Scar Predator having a Chest Buster that leaves us with the Pred-Alien, then THIS was the likely ROUTE to Continue.......  Then its also likely your going to need Human Characters, and so it was Logical that the SHIP would be heading to Earth.

Your left then with the case of WHERE!

So do you have the Ship Crash in/near a City?, a Rural Small Town or a Isolated Village?   Then we come to the NECESSITY for it to be in a English Speaking Country, as this is more simple as SADLY yes most Movies do prefer to be based on English for Wider Access to Puplic. So then your left with going to say USA, Canada, Hawaii, the UK, or say Australia/New Zealand (there are other options).

So they decided the USA and to a Rural Town....

The PROBLEMS ARISE..... from having the Movie being a Continuation of a Time-Line of the 21st Century, but i guess its a case of would having the Setting be another Isolated Place like the Antarctic again work?

I am sure many had Wondered what happens IF the Xenomorph gets to Earth and a Populated Place, and WELL... this is what AVPR attempts to Answer.....   

So your already LIMITED to what you can do, but then the BIGGEST PROBLEM... is Purely the Execution...

Execution from how to Write a Story about such a Plot was a bit Flawed, the Execution of said Plot as far as Casting/Writing and Acting was Below Par and Special Effects was not as Great!

We get that with Movies though.... Alien Resurrections Execution was NOT as good as the Previous MoviesThe THING prequel Plot Wise it could have worked, it was how they Fleshed Out and explored such a Plot but more so Execution that was just Sub Par!

So it was the EXECUTION that was POOR...

We ENDED up with a Movie thats like a lot of Survival Horror Flicks.... such as you see on Sy-Fy Channel....

Where they are all basically the same apart from you replace the ANTAGONIST/MONSTER and the Plot of HOW they are Discovered, Introduced or Summoned and what they Look Like and How they Respond/Kill.....

So replace Xenomorph with Zombie, with Toxic Mutant, another Alien Species, Summoned Demon, Leprechaun etc.....  

And AVPR was just like those but throw in Xenomorphs!

R.I.P Sox  01/01/2006 - 11/10/2017

dk

Sep-11-2019 4:47 PM

BD- you are way too kind to spend that much time on this turd.

 

AVPR was so bad, that when I put it out with the garbage, the automated truck made sure it was the only thing to stay in the garbage can.

Leto

Sep-11-2019 11:41 PM

Well, Predalien is pretty interesting.

BigDave

Sep-12-2019 7:42 AM

I watched it for the 4th Time Last Night, well 3rd Proper Time and i just Considered it as a Stand Alone..... by that i imagined if i had never seen ANY of the ALIEN or PREDATOR Movies.

Then it was not so BAD.... it was like so many those Sy-Fy Channel Action/Horror Flicks with some COOL ideas for MONSTER/ALIENS

The Alien Procreation was interesting, but the Adults just mindless Killing Machines, that Died quite Easy... so like Camerons Bug Hunt...

The Pred-Alien seemed to be better as it was more Tougher, but the Interesting thing was the PREDATOR and its Technology and Weapons...

The Rest of the Movie was MEH!

So then you saw the Potential in HOW they could explore those Aliens and Predator in Future.....

NOW if you considered AVP prior, then you would think that Actually this sequel is a LET-DOWN the Predator was Good, the Ending a Bit Lame, the Pred-Alien had potential but the Xenomorphs just not as Good as the First AVP!

IF you Consider the WHOLE of the Franchises, then you would see that AVPR was just a Disappointing way to use the Alien and Predator....

The Final 3rd of the Movie was not Good, and the Human Characters and scenes were MEH! some worked, some Scenes just never seemed to belong to a ALIEN or PREDATOR Franchise...

I will say the EFFECTS are not so bad.... not as Good as some others in the Franchise.... the Biggest Problem was close ups of the FULL Xenomorph, where it just has the MAN IN A SUIT look...

Why in ALIEN a lot was not shown of it, and also in Alien Covenant we had CGI!

We have this Problem with some Close Ups from ALIENS and also in ALIEN 3 where the Man in the Suit Alien looks different to the Puppet/CGI Version.

AVPR is a movie i would only Re-Watch now for some of the Action/Death Scenes... as the rest is well not worth seeing again..

R.I.P Sox  01/01/2006 - 11/10/2017

I Raptus

Sep-12-2019 11:20 PM

I try to find something redeeming in AVPR, but there just isn't much to like about it. A failure of poor story-telling. Nothing emotionally resonate in the film at all.

It was the first Alien film where a child was directly chestburst and did you feel for him. Nope. It resonated less so than even Burke or one of the unnamed bald, old, convicts running around in the lead works of Fury.   

BD i've tried several times to sit through it too. I think after about 6 attempts (including the first cinema viewing) Ive made it through to end once. Its just boring, weak, and lackluster on every level  

Gavin

Sep-12-2019 11:36 PM

AvP:R is a bad movie, but it has two redeeming factors IMO...

#1 - Wolf is the second best Predator ever after the one in the 1987 original, and

#2 - It is better than The Predator.

dk

Sep-12-2019 11:58 PM

I will try to say something positive about AVPR. The eggs being forced down the woman's throat was pretty gruesome and well done.

I watched The Predator a couple nights ago and think it was better than AVPR by a large margin- but not really worth watching again.

dk

Sep-13-2019 5:30 PM

Back to bashing even though I said we shalt not speak of AVPR again lol!

So a pregnant patient heart rate stops

Yet, she is found caccooned and yelling- obviously breathing and therefore a heart beat (the monitor reads a systole and not that any leads are disconnected). 

AND the offspring don't even have Predator dread locks or claws from the mouth- smdh

 

dk

Sep-13-2019 5:30 PM

Back to bashing even though I said we shalt not speak of AVPR again lol!

So a pregnant patient heart rate stops

Yet, she is found caccooned and yelling- obviously breathing and therefore a heart beat (the monitor reads a systole and not that any leads are disconnected. 

AND the offspring don't even have Predator dead locks or claws from the mouth- smdh

 

I Raptus

Sep-14-2019 7:54 PM

DK you raise an interesting point about that scene. I think we should discuss the elephant in the room about the Predalien. I started a new thread as my response was too long for this thread. 

 http://www.alien-covenant.com/topic/49197

dk

Sep-15-2019 11:04 PM

AVPR was very dark and pretty much black at crucial parts.

They may have misinterpreted Dan O'bannon's premise for less is more. too much darkness actually bores people.

BigDave

Sep-22-2019 5:43 PM

So i watched The Predator......

And.... well i am kind of Speechless ;)

PLOT: I think had Potential... The Effects were decent, its just the whole Writing Process, Silliness and Execution....

I thought The Last Jedi took Force Awakens and Messed up all that came before.....   i felt Alien Covenant also did that to ALIEN...

But then comes along The Predator... and well No Comment!

I am not sure it would WARRANT a 2nd Viewing... but then i said the same about AVPR, and i watched that 4 Times Now.... but i doubt EVER AGAIN!

Compared to the 1987 Movie... what a Joke!

R.I.P Sox  01/01/2006 - 11/10/2017

Thoughts_Dreams

Sep-10-2020 11:28 AM

I can't believe that I didn't find this one earlier. :D

How about this? AVPR is so bad so my computer exploded when I pressed play (OK not really but you get the idea).

Every true alien-fan must crap at it at least once during their life-time. If you don't you will be turned into an extra in AVPR. ;)

Anyone else that wants to have a go at this? Look at it as being a chance to show your creativity when it comes to come up with insults against crappy movies.

SuperAlien

Sep-10-2020 3:26 PM

I struggled just once to watch AVPR and only until the scenes with the pregnant women (a lot of patience involved), after that I simply deleted this crap from my computer (had it as digital copy).

I can't think of a more shitty film, even The Predator was better.

"He survived, he’s now in Disneyland in Orlando, and no way am I going back there. How did he end up in Disneyland? I saw him in Disneyland, Jesus Christ!"

Thoughts_Dreams

Sep-14-2020 4:14 AM

SuperAlien:

Maybe that was the reason why they released it? To show us that they could do better than AVPR. It’s like “Hey we can redeem ourselves!” :D

The problem is that when you have reached the absolute bottom then there is only one direction to go: up.

hox

Sep-14-2020 7:27 AM

AVPR only has one redeeming feature: one of the lead characters has a hot body.

Blackwinter-witch

Sep-14-2020 3:10 PM

AVPR...

Yeah, well...it's one of those films that had enormous raw potential...but just failed for many reasons.

Interesting ideas were in it, but as has been said, poor execution, and likely the timing of it's release.

I do NOT--and NEVER will consider AVP nor AVPR to be even light years close to Canon, they're money-maker monster-bash movies, plain and simple.

Taken by themselves, as stand-alones...AVP and AVPR are pretty good monster movies, akin to The Blob and such.

BUT...connecting it to the ALIEN and Predator franchises...was risky, and AVP did okay...AVPR, well...it speaks for itself about rolling the dice too often.

IF AVP had involved NEW/Unique monsters...then these two films might well have given rise to a new franchise.

Failed gamble and a wasted opportunity is what they both are.

But...Hollywood. (shrug)

AVPR, is so bad, it makes me very glad for my mangled glasses frames as even if it comes on, I only have the migraine from the glasses to cope with and can't really see that abomination of a movie. :D

IN SPACE THERE IS NO WARNING

 

 

 

BlackAnt

Sep-14-2020 4:30 PM

@Everyone

“Yeah, well...it's one of those films that had enormous raw potential...but just failed for many reasons.”

Great opening paragraph Blackwinter-witch. I think it is right here that I would most fervently disagree with almost every bad thing stated about this film.

Just a small synopsis….we get the predalien onboard the Predator ship, it crashes on Earth, a human city is exposed, a Predator on their home world is tasked with neutralizing the situation on Earth, a large battle ensues, and humanity is victorious in the end.

So before I critique this film properly in all fairness….please no backlash against me personally for my opinions….we are all here to discuss things alien, have fun, and foster a great community for everyone.

I went into this film with high expectations. The film went through it’s motions and I genuinely liked the film overall. I think the performances as a whole were decent, the special effects exceptional for their time, the plot was something that just interested me for personal reasons (will explain more about that later), there were many unique scenes in the film, we got a first introduction to the Predator home world, the fight sequences were enhanced with different modalities then previous films, and overall the film brought a Xeno to Earth.

The possibilities of a Xeno on Earth was both interesting conceptually and thematically for me.

For me personally I enjoy getting lost in all Alien films, even if there are only parts of the film that I like, because I like science fiction in film that much overall.

I agree the raw potential of this film as an uncut diamond the size of a fist was there…as the budget for this film, the plot, the production of the film cut away through its treatment of concepts made by RS originally, and many others, it failed to yield the finer more brilliant cut stone that we all wanted….

So much of this film however did resonate with me. I felt the tension for survival by the humans in this production to be real enough when faced with aliens much more powerful than them. I enjoyed their attempts to evade and escape an impending doom.

I also enjoyed very much the Colonel listening in on the jet then calling in the air strike.

I liked the pool scene very much where the Predator dissolved what was in the pool.

I was very impressed with the Predator home world and enjoyed the intricate articulation of the mechanized Predator chair and it's computers.

The hospital battle was intense, exciting, and visually exciting for me.

I especially enjoyed the Predator ship crash landing on Earth and the man and his son getting exposed.

For me obviously then I liked many parts of the film; however, overall I think the movie is ok. I still enjoy what strengths it has and will stick with that…in other words I would rather have it then not just because it is an Alien film.

Years prior I had written a small treatment set in on a future Earth, which was dismissed by other Alien forum contributors, that was not well received.

Here is a quick synopsis of that treatment. There is a future Earth where resources are exhausted battling an ever growing global Xeno infestation. We are down to last remaining military outposts around the world and free humans are on the verge of extinction.

Inside large new Xeno cities we would see never seen before complex Xeno behavior and battle tactics on a global scale…..the Xenos build large city sized hives where humans are cultivated as a food source ….more than one hundred years have passed since they over took the planet….so they breed and harvest humans for food throughout these global system of hives…..they secrete a range of molecules that when ingested by humans causes them to reproduce….they take the babies and harvest them, then separating the babies from the human breeders….and harvest us by the millions…..as the babies mature they have no fear of the Xenos tending them, humans play run around Xeno with out a care in the Xeno hives; but, by a certain age they use humans as food sustaining all the Xenos in the hives. A never seen before Xeno feeds back to the humans a semi digested eatable rich nutritional secretion so the adult breeders are sustained. And you can imagine how this would all look and sound….humans that have no language, are completely obedient of these Xeno hives, how it might look with many Queens in the hives….the drones feeding the Queens live humans slowly, part ritual, feeding, and pleasurable for the Xenos on some intelligent level.

Then I intended on the human resistance to be equally as formidable so they could go into the hives undetected on reconnaissance missions through stealth and study how to neutralize the global colonies.

I also intended for there to be many new Xeno chimeras that are far more formidable at protecting the drones and Queens inside the hives….very powerful and fast Xenos that can kill instantly with many more types of weapons.

As I stated this was not well received and I really do not care…it was something I dreamed up and to this day enjoy thinking about the potential of such a large conflict…it’s complexities, how the human characters would feel in their deep subterranean cities…where there is power, food, more advanced computers, military science, and human devotion to survival at all costs.

I wanted there to be much desperation, the loss of never ending battles with the new Xenomorphs, the inexplicable fear of sacrificing personal survival for information gained by going into the hives. Most of the reconnaissance missions never return so they are mostly a one way ticket in but never back out.

When I saw AVPR I got a small glimpse of those possibilities taking place in a distant future Earth timeline….I wanted something more profoundly deadly at all points in-between, dark and seductively sinister.....for me the Xeno was never played out just other peoples ideas about what was really possible was tired and played out....I never thought the Xeno was done, and actually wanted to see much more of the Xeno in a much richer complexity and what that might mean…..so that we see the Xeno infestation as a more diversely connected cohesive whole throughout nature itself as they completely overwhelm all the different systems of Earth’s biology.

More often than not I strive to see more potential in all these films than less. They take me down the rabbit hole and can be a good place to start a new story, if nothing else just for artistic purposes.

BigDave

Sep-14-2020 4:59 PM

"So before I critique this film property in all fairness"

I think that the PLOT was not BAD it was the Characters and Writing and Execution, there was some Interesting Ideas, its just the way the Story was Wrote and Executed was well.... bit Crap Really ;)

But for me the same is to be said with  The Predator

I had tried to watch AVPR for a 4th Time but could not, and i had tried to watch The Predator for a 3rd and well i GAVE UP lol

R.I.P Sox  01/01/2006 - 11/10/2017

dk

Sep-14-2020 9:26 PM

To the OP- LOL- here we are a year later talking about it!

BlackAnt I thought your story ideas were sound enough. Lots of fans have good spin off stories that are better than their source material, so giving up might be premature.

The views on AVPR make sense and are generous. Yes, there were good ideas and some decent scenes, but as a whole, it's just not good enough to re-watch to see certain scenes imo. The actors themselves weren't bad yet I felt nothing for their characters. I think BigDave sort of nailed it- it was poorly written and executed. 

It's too bad since AVP was a solid action scifi popcorn flick that I will re-watch for sheer entertainment.

hox

Sep-15-2020 12:35 AM

@BlackAnt,

Help me, Daddy.  Please.  It hurts.  Make it stop.  Make it stop.

You might enjoy the original screenplay, lol.

BigDave

Sep-15-2020 5:21 AM

@Blackant

Regarding your IDEA i dont mean any Disrespect but it is something that is VERY Comic/Video Game.  Which is NOT really a BAD thing as there would be a Market for such Ideas in the Fandom, and as a Movie its something that has NOT been done and so MAYBE it could work ;)

You see the Xenomorph is MAINLY known for its Incarnation from ALIENS.  Its Purpose is just to SURVIVE and it is somewhat a Invasive Species like a RAT/MOUSE but also like a ANT/TERMITE.   

DUMB BUGZ some may say.... but i have Defended the JC Xenomorphs in the Past as Showing signs of Intelligence for the ORIGINAL Versions (ALIEN) this Xenomorph just basically went around and KILLED its only the DC version that showed a Agenda to Procreate.

As much as this somewhat Intelligent Invasive Species are, i always thought you could NOT keep going back to that FORMULA before it gets STALE!

So you had to UPLIFT/EVOLVE the Xenomorph to CHANGE it be that a ENGINEERED UPGRADE or a EVOLUTIONARY ONE.

Because its ORIGINS appear to be just a Engineered Bio-Weapon that may have been Engineered from some Pre-existing Alien Species.  The David as Creator Plot would allow more Room to explore that the Xenomorph was intended to be MORE than to just KILL etc.

So your PLOT seems to go for having the Xenomorph Evolve and Advance and to SHOW that we have Barely Scratched the Surface of this Organisms Intelligence.

And so i Applaud your Attempt to UPLIFT the Xenomorph, i Certainly think it could be Interesting and Especially if we look at it from a ENGINEERED UPGRADE.

If we looked at the NEW version of The Planet of the Apes then we see this was a HUBRIS of Mankind trying to Experiment with Apes.... i think it would be FITTING if we had Xenomorphs that were Captured and Experimented on and this Lead to a Xenomorph that would become more Inteligent and able to Re-Write its DNA so that it can Create Hybrids for Certain Tasks and THIS becomes a HUGE HUBRIS after a Outbreak and Escape by these Xenomorphs.

And they then SPREAD around the World.

I will add that i am NOT sure i ever came across when you had Mentioned this IDEA before.  Its something that i Certainly think a Game/Comic could work with.   And if its DONE RIGHT then it maybe could Work as a Movie, it Certainly could be something that would GAIN more Attention and Make Money $$$$ compared to Following on with where David is going NEXT.

R.I.P Sox  01/01/2006 - 11/10/2017

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